Reading LinkedIn posts lately, everything is tuned toward exciting fresh starts and new beginnings for the start of a new year. The month of January seems to have a way of shouting from the roof tops with new goals and new plans which can often be exciting for some but for others it can be very daunting.
What if your life has been turned upside down and you are facing the end of a significant relationship or a recently announced divorce, you may be asking yourself:
- What does my future look like?
- What does the new me look like?
- What feels right for me now?
- I’m just not sure about best next steps.
Divorce or separation is an emotional untangling. It’s grief, relief, fear, hope and exhaustion all living in the same space.
You feel exhausted and the year has just begun.
Remember it’s not about becoming someone new but finding your footing again.
“You don’t need to reinvent yourself this year. You need to reconnect with yourself”
When wanting to start a new beginning please don’t rush the healing. Consider giving yourself permission to slow down.
Stop pressuring yourself to look like all is well on the outside. Spend time seeking guidance and let me help you look at ways to bring out the best version of yourself. I can assist with providing communication strategies to help reduce conflict. Support self-discovery and help you with listening inwardly so you can then look forward to the future with plans that align with the new you.
Let me help you to learn how to make decisions and choose differently based on your values rather than fear.
When a relationship ends, especially one that has been your identity for years, it is easy to fall back into familiar patterns. Not because they were healthy but because they are known to you. Remember that choosing differently isn’t about dramatic reinvention or bold statements. It’s about thoughtful considered and quiet repeated decisions that slowly move you out of survival mode and into self-trust.
What does choosing differently look like?
- Respond instead of reacting
- Trust your instincts even when they feel unfamiliar
- Letting go of timelines and comparisons
- Pausing before you decide. Ask yourself are you putting someone else’s needs ahead of your own. (This may be extremely relevant if children are involved but that is a whole other topic on its own).
- Saying “NO” without explaining yourself.
- Allow time to think about change. If this comes with discomfort remember that feeling uncomfortable may be because you are breaking patterns or cycles that once kept you safe – even if they also kept you stuck.
- In relationships many of us learn to adapt, accommodate and compromise to ensure we maintain equilibrium. Wonderful when it is balanced on both sides and you ultimately do this because you care and love each other. When things become out of kilter questions arise.
Choosing Differently doesn’t mean choosing perfectly. It means allowing yourself to move forward without having everything figured out.
Coaching during this time isn’t about fixing you – because you aren’t broken. It’s about helping you feel steady enough to move forward with clarity, confidence and understanding what you truly want and need.
If you would like to hear more information around this topic, please schedule your complimentary 30-minute consultation. Let me help you through some of your queries.
